Happy 17 Years of Celibacy (Until Marriage) to me! (This is not an exact date, it is a vicinity.)
I do not consider myself to be better than ANYONE! The LORD has led me to share my celibacy journey and the benefits of waiting until marriage.
Humbly said and glory to God: I have been celibate for 17 years! Yes, I am almost 35 and I am celibate until marriage, I will not kiss anyone simply based on physical attraction (I have not kissed anyone in over four years, I have no problem with kissing, that special moment just hasn't happened yet), I am not yet married, and I have no children (yet). Some people find my previous statement odd, they get curious, they question me (and my family *laughing*), I have even been treated as if something is wrong with me . . . . However, I embrace my celibacy journey with confidence in God's will for my life, knowing that all of God’s decisions and desires for me are rooted in His LOVE for me, including regarding my love life.
Here is why celibacy before marriage is rewarding and awesome:
Your Body is Not a Bargaining Tool:
If you have to use your body to get or to keep a man/woman, he/she is not "the one" God desires for you. God desires for you to be LOVED— not used, objectified or lusted after. Maintaining this mindset helps you to keep your spiritual walk, integrity, self-respect, and (humble) self-love healthy.
Having Patience and Honoring God’s Holy Word are Rewarding:
Firstly, it is best to be single and wait patiently on true love given by GOD—so that you can experience a loving, faithful, overall happy, healthy, relationship and marriage. Instead of settling for or rushing into the arms of the wrong person (even a possible plant from Satan), in order to try to alleviate feelings of loneliness or eliminate fears of ending up alone—and experiencing avoidable pain, discord, distress, and heartache in your life as results of a toxic situation.
Now, on to sex. Celibacy before marriage is beautiful and beneficial: It provides more focus on building a strong foundation of godliness, best-friend-ship, openness, comfort with one another, and love. A strong holy, loving, respectful, foundation is so very important to have to build upon. Take sex and sexual activities out of the equation until marriage, and lust and the "natural high" producing endorphins produced by the climax of sex cannot be mistaken for love. God is not the author of confusion. Therefore, God does not want us to be confused about whether or not we are in love or in lust, or whether or not someone truly loves us or is just lusting after us. While sex has been created to be very beautiful and very pleasurable (between a husband and wife, faithfully), please understand that there is more to love and marriage than sex: You are loving, marrying, and sharing a life with, a personality, a heart, a mind, a spirit; a being with a soul, feelings, thoughts, and emotions; someone with talents, gifts, and purpose; a creation of God, whom He also has a will for—not just a body.
Allow God to Prepare You for the Future:
Over the years, my journey has been very heartbreaking, and even lonely at times. However, however, however!: My journey has also been very rewarding, strengthening, empowering, and beautiful! I have grown as a woman of God, as a woman in general, and as a person. God has prepared me for my future. Now, I am not just "ready", I am also PREPARED. That's another beautiful thing about waiting: In your season of waiting, God prepares you, and your future husband/wife, for the life He has in store for you! He also prepares you for each other—how to love each other, how to be loved by each other, for your spiritual purpose(s) together as one, and more. You are set up for success, by God Himself!
Conclusion:
GOD'S WILL being fulfilled as well as having AUTHENTIC LOVE are vital. Knowledge, understanding, and the valuing of both, all come from seeking God by reading His Word and by having a prayer life (talking to AND listening to God).
THIS is love, right from the Source, our Heavenly Father:
4 Love is patient and
kind. Love is not jealous or boastful or proud 5 or rude. It does not demand
its own way. It is not irritable, and it keeps no record of being wronged. 6 It
does not rejoice about injustice but rejoices whenever the truth wins out. 7
Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through
every circumstance.
-1 Corinthians 13:4-7
Seek God and His will for your life. Pray. Wait patiently. Trust God and His love for you. God's got a perfect plan for your life! Humbly said, I surely know my Heavenly Father does for mine. [Heavenly Father, thy perfect will shall always be done in my life, on earth as it is in Heaven!]
Making sure God's intended purposes for His mission for me stay intact, and making sure the direction of the celibacy posts stay in alignment with GOD'S WILL, I must explain the following:
God led me to share about celibacy before marriage and my testimony for these reasons only: to encourage celibacy before marriage and to shed light on all of the benefits and beauty in waiting until marriage to have sex. The intention is NOT to share about my love life. As prayerfully led by the LORD, only pieces of my love life, mainly past lessons, have to be included because, sometimes, the topic of celibacy goes hand in hand with one's love life. However, my love life is NOT the focus: God's Word (the Holy Bible), His teachings, what the Holy Spirit leads me to share in prayer, and lessons from my testimony, are the focuses.
Charrese Monique
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